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(2-6 YEARS) (IDENTITY DEVELOPMENT)
The positive discipline approach is the idea of instilling desired rules and behaviors in the child without harming their personality and self-esteem.
This way, the child not only adopts the rules and develops positive personality traits, but also these traits become permanent in them. They can self-regulate and discipline themselves when they are alone, and develop healthy attitudes.
WHAT SHOULD BE INCLUDED IN THE POSITIVE DISCIPLINE APPROACH
Unconditional love and expression of love for the child, acceptance
• Using the phrase "You are always valuable to me, I love you very much" with sincerity and reflecting this with actions, rather than saying "I will only love you if you act this way". This is very important for the child's mental health and well-being.
Trust in the child
• Taking the child's thoughts into consideration and valuing their opinions on matters that concern them, saying appreciative words, and creating a positive self-image in the child.
Being a good role model
• Demanding behavior that is not done or done unwillingly will not have a positive effect on the child.
Getting to know the child
• Knowing the child's characteristics, abilities, likes, dislikes, fears, and how they express their emotions (talking, hitting, breaking things, sulking), knowing their favorite friends, and acting accordingly, contribute to problem-solving.
Being self-assured and decisive
• Being firm and consistent, but not stubborn. The child's desires and objections may be justified. If necessary, change the attitude and explain it to the child.
Setting limits in behavior
• The child should be given limitations to understand what is normal and abnormal behavior. The child should know what behaviors are necessary and what behaviors are not necessary for their development.
Trying to understand the cause of negative behavior
• There can be many different reasons for a problem. The situation may be the child's general reaction, or it may be caused by an instant discomfort. You should try to understand the situation and the child.
Providing options for solutions and guidance
• When the child is asked not to do something, they should be told the reason and provided with options to guide them.
Not comparing the child to others
• Negative comparisons lead to the formation of negative self-perception and feeling worthless in the child. It creates jealousy and hostility.
Being relaxed, calm, and patient
• The child's reasonable requests and needs should be met without delay, and when they show negative aggressive behavior and make requests, one should avoid emotional reactions and remain calm and patient. After the child has calmed down, they should be told that the behavior is inappropriate and that they will not be able to achieve anything by behaving in that way again.